Senseless Ramblings

In retrospect, I had a lot of optimism and courage. 

Growing up with the view that everything is possible or attainable, I always had high hopes for getting what I wanted. And perhaps, that could be a good reason behind my determinism. Because when I set on my target, whether it's up a tall hill or deep down a sink hole, I'm on it and there's no turning back. 

I wish I still see things like that..

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But I guess, people view things differently at different times in their life...

I don't know if I'm seeing it this way because I got more valuable experiences than I had before...

I don't know if I'm seeing it this way because experiences have led me to know fear...

I don't know if I'm seeing it this way because I'm wiser...

All I know is...

I'm slowly becoming such a nerve and a coward..and I cannot continue seeing things this way.

I have to take on risks and move forward.

Crap.

I miss her badly..